The Difference Between Men and Women

"Men are respectable only as they respect.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

The more time I spend in Cuenca, the more I realize how unequally men and women are treated in Ecuador. I recognize there is still inequality amongst the sexes in the United States too, but here it tends to be even more prominent. Ecuador is a very patriarchal society. In other words, men rule. In their households, men are expected to be the main providers for their families, but in reality, women actually end up doing even more work. Not only do they have full time jobs, but they are expected to cook, clean, take care of the household, and take care of the kids, which is a full time job in itself. I found this all out after having a discussion about male and female roles with my host-mother, and I know what she says is true just from observing everything she does in a day. She wakes up two hours early just to make me breakfast, goes to work for four hours, returns to make me lunch, goes back to work for five more hours until 7 pm, returns to fix me dinner, and then helps me with homework, cleans up the kitchen, picks up her daughter from the university, and maybe even runs to the store to get a few items needed for lunch the next day. In cotrast, I hardly ever see my host-father, mainly because he’s either at work or just up in his room resting. In addition to women having more responsibilities than men, men seem to lack respect for women in a lot of cases. For example, on the streets, simply walking to school, I have been whistled at, cat-called, and looked up and down in broad daylight by various men at least a few times a week. It is mortifying and obnoxious, and yet the Ecuadorian men don’t seem to have a care in the world that it disgusts us women. Don’t women deserve the some respect after all of their hard work?

¿Me Entiende?

"The biggest miscommunication is to assume communication has taken place." ~Anonymous

I never realized just how important communication was until I was forced to. This past Friday, I got terribly sick and had to go to the hospital. Now, going to the hospital is one thing, but going to a hospital where they only speak Spanish is a different story. Yes, I speak some Spanish. Unfortunately, we haven't covered very much vocabulary pertaining the medical field. After my appointment, my professor, Dr. Boe, and I went to the counter to figure out if insurance would cover the bill. With my Spanish-English Dictionary in hand, I tried to communicate with the secretary, but my vocabulary and grammar knowledge wasn't sufficient enough to get across my point about the insurance situation. The secretary left to find someone who knew how to speak English, but after fifteen minutes of waiting, she still hadn't returned. We found out we could settle the financial details the next day, so we just ended up leaving. In the end, Dr. Boe and I were able to decipher enough to get by during the actual appointment, but needless to say, it was still pretty scary, especially without having something as simple as the comfort of your native language. I guess a good thing that came out of it was that it got me to think about why it's so important to know another language. Not only would it have been more convenient for me to know Spanish fluently for my own sake, but it would have been nice if I had a doctor that spoke more than five words in English too. Since I'm majoring in Education, I decided it would be a good thing to minor in Spanish too. Spanish is a very common language in the United States now, and besides loving the language, I realize how important it is becoming to know more than one language, especially with the recent boom in globalization. There are more foreign companies and immigrants in the U.S. now more than ever. Even though English is a pretty well-known language all over the world, it just doesn't seem to suffice to know only one language anymore. I don't want to be one of those people who is ignorant of other languages and cultures. Becoming fluent, or at least having a solid background in a different language, not only makes your life easier, but can also help others that are put in a difficult situation.

Concept of Time

The concept of time here is so different than in the United States. Before we left the country, I read in a book that when you are invited to a party or other events, you are to arrive at least half hour later than the stated time. I just didn't actually believe it. Though I haven't gotten invited to any parties or events yet, I at least have come to see that time is a very flexible concept in Ecuador, especially compared to the United States. When we went on hikes in the Amazon, the guides stated that they weren't that long of hikes...and yet they were at least three hours long. In addition, my classmates and I were told that our Spanish classes were to start promptly at 8am, and every single class has started at least five or ten minutes late so far this week. As another example, my host mom makes me breakfast every morning, but doesn't have it ready until 7:20. The problem is that I have a 30 minute commute to school every morning and classes start at 8am. If I were in the United States, I would make sure I was at class at least ten minutes early, let alone on time, or else I would be being extremely rude to my professors. The irony is that I don't arrive at my school until right at 8am, and I still tend to be five minutes early. In general, Ecuadorians seem to be very relaxed getting places they need to go when they need to be there. I think all of us Americans can learn from this. I know I personally get super stressed out when I'm running late for an appointment or for class. But while I've been here, I've also learned that there's no use stressing out over time. Time, truly, is irrelevant.

Living the Simple Life

It's amazing how easy it is to forget to appreciate all of the little things in life. Things like a warm shower, some air conditioning, the ability to wear a clean set of clothes every day, or to have a bowl of Coco Puffs for breakfast. Ecuador is a whole new realm to me. Sure, I've been out of the country for a few different vacations, but I have never been forced to live the life of the locals. I've come to realize how hard it can be to let go of all of the material things we come to depend on so much. I haven't used a cell phone in two weeks, and I've hardly had a computer to check my Facebook and emails. I've worn the same two pairs of pants for the last two weeks, have had to use a bottle of water just to brush my teeth, and can't even throw my toilet paper in the toilet.. I haven't been able to wear my favorite necklace, earrings, and rings at all, and my new best friends have become my oh so fashionable rubber boots. But here's the thing: being forced to separate from these things has been so...refreshing. Being thrown into situations where I simply don't have the choice to care about what I look like or how clean I am, it has become apparent that life at its simplest is the most enjoyable way to live life in the first place. I am happier and more at peace right now than I ever have been in my life. Well, that, and I feel ALIVE. If I haven't already learned that a simple life is a good life, I can at least know to appreciate all the little things I take for granted.

I'm going to Ecuador?!

If someone would have told me two years ago that I would be studying abroad in Ecuador one day, I probably would have laughed in their face. Even after signing up and filling out all the paperwork for the trip last semester, I didn’t know if it was really going to happen; after all, since there were such a low number of sign-ups, the trip almost got completely cancelled. Now that all of the wrinkles are ironed over and the trip is almost here, I’m literally jumping out of my shoes. It’s funny how life can throw a hurdle in your way, and yet, once it is overcome, reaching your goal becomes that much sweeter.

I cannot begin to describe just how blessed I feel to be going on this trip. My dad was nice enough to hire me to work teaching summer camp at his karate school so that I would be able to go. I worked 50 hours a week this summer just to save up enough money to study abroad: 10 weeks of work for 10 weeks in Ecuador. It seemed like a good enough trade-off for me. . It’s funny how life can throw hurdles in your way, and yet, once they are overcome, reaching your goal becomes that much sweeter. Now, all of my hard work is about to pay off! Ecuador, here I come!